Request for Duas 

At the beginning of this year I set out to do something, however 4 months down the line and things are just not going the way I thought it would. I’ve been shunted from pillar to post staring at unreplied to messages and emails, being let down by people repeatedly.
I’m at that point where I feel so much of despair. I can’t back down because there’s too much at stake so today I’m humbly requesting duas because I’m very much in need of them.

I would greatly appreciate if the former readers of this blog would take just a minute to make dua for me. The dua you make for your Muslim brother or sister in his/her absence is readily accepted and the angels say: “Ameen and it is for you also”.

In turn please comment with your dua requests or drop me an email at desertrose315@yahoo.com

With Ramadaan approaching I would appreciate if even one person would remember me in their duas.

Ramadaan Mubarak. Please follow aspiring to be a better Muslim for spiritual updates. In Shaa Allah.
http://aspiringtobeabettermuslim.wordpress.com


If you missed it…

If you missed it, the new blog starts today. Do be sure to check it out:

http://secondbest2016.wordpress.com/

You never know if you’ll enjoy reading it unless you take a look ;-)…


New Blog

*Tomorrow is going to be a crazy morning so I decided to post this now

I would firstly like to start off by thanking everyone for their support once again. I replied to comments this past weekend and reading them again really touched me. I want everyone to know that their kind words and support really really mean a lot to me. You’ll never know how much I appreciate it and how it brings a smile to my face.

The biggest thing for me is knowing that this blog has made a difference in people’s lives and that people have benefited from it. I stand by everything I said and my offer on calculating qadha salaah still stands. If you would like help please drop me an email at desertrose315@yahoo.com

There’s no shame in asking for help. Though it would be a shame if the opportunity was presented to you and you missed it.

On that note it’s time to bid farewell to this blog and to welcome another. I present to you my next offering:

Second Best
http://www.secondbest2016.wordpress.com/


Future Endeavours

Just before I completed this blog I didn’t want to write another one, but what can I say? I’m a sucker. I’ve come to enjoy writing. As such I would like to write another story.

However I do need a break and some time to start penning posts. That’s why I’m thinking of starting a new blog on 14 March 2016.

I’ll announce details of it next week Monday, 29 February 2016 In Shaa Allah.

I would also just like to thank sister/in/Islam and bint Ebrahim by allowing each of them to make a request of me (please be reasonable :-P) and I will do my best to fulfil your requests. If it’s a bit much it’s up for negotiation 😛


Final (but not quite final) words on special needs

*My apologies. At the moment I’m caught in this dangerous combination of busy and lazy, but it’s still Saturday right? I appreciate all the comments and feedback sent through by everyone and I will try to respond as soon as I can. Just know that I do appreciate it 🙂

Even though this blog is now complete I will always wonder whether I did justice to it. I really wanted to portray what it’s like for special needs children and their parents but each case is so unique I don’t know if that would be possible.

Even though I say it’s the “final words” it’s not quite final. I’ll always have something to say on special needs. I’ll always come across cases and want to share it.

A lot of people were very saddened by the stories shared and a few would like to help these people, however what I want you to bear in mind is that these are just a few of the stories I’ve shared. As I’ve sad before I can tell you stories and stories of the saddest cases. I come across so many that it’s impossible to help everyone. It’s something I have to remind myself of too, that you can’t help everyone and you can’t save everyone but you can do your best.

I urge you to make dua (pray) for them. Also if you would like to help special needs children in any way please find reputable organisations through which to do it (I unfortunately don’t know of any). If there are any special needs facilities in your area please visit them and find out if you can help in any way. A few special needs schools have Facebook pages too.
My personal advice is that if you ever get the chance please go and visit a special needs school. Your heart will break. I’ve seen wonderful special needs schools where teachers and therapists are so dedicated and how they do so much to uplift the kids. I take my hat off to those teachers and therapists because of the wonderful work they’re doing and because working in a special needs schools is so taxing and emotionally draining.

However on the flip side I’ve seen special needs schools where teachers are just there to babysit the kids and collect a pay cheque. Those are the ones that sadden me the most because in the end the children suffer.

Something else I’d like to mention as well is that yes special needs children do sexually abuse each other (if given the opportunity). The reasons for this were mentioned in one of the posts but it’s not purposeful (in the beginning anyway) it’s more experimental.

Sadder still is when normal people abuse them. There were cases of two special schools with boarding facilities that were implicated in abuse. The one school’s teacher was found sexually abusing the students. While the other’s house parent was found to be physically violent towards the children.

Like I’ve said before the world is a very cruel place for a special needs child. May Allah make it easy for them. Please remember them in your duas.

Below are just a few early signs to watch out for which may indicate that the child has special needs:

Late talking:
Many people are quick to brush this off and dismiss it as normal. It is NOT normal. Mothers are quick to reassure other mothers that late talking is fine and that the child will be fine. Worse still is when doctors say it’s ok. It’s NOT ok.

Late talking is often the first indicator that something is wrong. If a child talks late there could be a number of possibilities:
1. Hearing loss
2. Autism Spectrum Disorder
3. Pervasive Developmental Disorder
4. Downs Syndrome
5. Cognitive Impairments
6. Other (undiagnosed)
7. Delayed development

Those children that turn out to be “late talkers” as mothers describe, fall under developmental delay. Normal children should start speaking between 12-15 months. If they don’t that’s delayed. Please get the child evaluated ASAP. Best  case scenario is if the child simply has delayed development, however it is still a problem because they will not be on the same level as their peers. This will affect their ability to socialise with others, their ability to learn and to communicate. It can also result in bullying and frustration. That’s why on the whole late talking is very serious.

Hearing related:
If a child has pus coming out of the ear it is not normal and it will not go away on its own. It’s most likely an ear infection and needs to be treated with antibiotics. If left untreated it can result in a permanent hearing loss. Please don’t put your own things into the ear-go to a doctor. It is extremely important to finish dosages of antibiotics because if you don’t you can develop resistance to them. Then you’ll need something stronger. In worse cases (which we see way too often) people develop resistance to multiple antibiotics thus making them close to impossible to treat.

Also another thing is if you have pain in the ear please don’t put things like onion or garlic juice (or any fruit and vegetable juice) into the ear. I know people pass it around as home remedies but please DO NOT DO IT! In order to correctly treat ear pain you need to know the cause of it. Most of the time ear pain is caused by “referred pain”. That means that the pain is being caused elsewhere in the body (usually anywhere from head to stomach) but is causing ear pain instead. That’s why putting funny things into the ear is NOT GOING TO HELP!

If you have any dizziness/vertigo or balance problems please consult an audiologist/ENT. I see people advising each other to do certain exercises. Please stop asking doctor Facebook. Treatment is dependent on the diagnosis. Just because two people have vertigo doesn’t mean that diagnosis and treatment will be the same. Ask a professional.

Muscle related:
If your child has been diagnosed with cerebral palsy please don’t just do nothing about it. Please attend regular sessions of occupational and physiotherapy. Alternatively if you notice the child looking a bit “floppy” (not meeting their milestones such as lifting the head up, sitting, standing etc.) Please consult a professional.

Other risk factors not specifically related to children:
(Shared by a sister currently studying in the allied field)
With septic limbs, depending on the severity, there could be severe joint paint like in septic arthritis where there’s inflammation caused by infection. From injuries, for example, there could be leg tenderness, swelling, loss of movement and pus leaking from  the leg. If you experience any of the above please have it checked out.

Other visible abnormalities such as microcephaly (smaller than normal head), macrocephaly (larger than normal head), heart disease, scoliosis (curvature of the spine) etc. Will be diagnosed by a doctor. Kindly act on the doctors recommendations in such cases.

Ok now please don’t play doctor Google and self diagnose (except for the late talking which you should pick up). If you are concerned about anything mentioned kindly consult a professional.

If there are any further questions I’ll try to assist withing my capacity. I urge you to share this message so that people can benefit. The special needs children that have the poorest outcomes are those who were diagnosed late. Late diagnosis often stems from ignorance so please educate people by sharing this message.

On Monday I will post a message about future endeavours. In Shaa Allah.


Real Life Stories 5

*Apologies apologies. It’s been a busy day. I know there was supposed to be a post up last week Saturday on the warning signs but I didn’t manage to post it. It’ll hopefully be up tomorrow along with some final words. Then on Monday I’ll announce what it is that I plan to do In Shaa Allah

There is a little girl, only 5 years old who was recently placed in a care home. The caregiver at the care home said that this child’s mother used to abuse her hence she had to be taken out of her care.

When she was brought to the care home she was found to have visual problems, hearing problems and her legs were injured.

Some of her sight has been restored, however she now has a profound hearing loss and wear splints on both of her legs.

When I saw her she displayed behaviours indicative of someone who has come from an abused background. She used to bite things and crawl despite being able to walk.

This child has also been infected with HIV and is on a very high dosage of medication. Medical professionals are now deciding whether her dosage is beneficial or detrimental.


Real Life Stories 4

*Apologies for the late post, got so busy this morning.

There is a young boy that I saw last year some time. He looked okay (aside from his impairment). However this year when he returned he looked horribly ill.

He couldn’t eat and if fed he would vomit. He was so thin his wrist was barely there. His ribs were sticking out and he was emaciated.

The child is in the final stages of HIV infection. He has 7 siblings and the house has no income. They are all infected and live in a small dwelling from which they will soon be evacuated as the landlords have other uses for the premises.

I was told that fumes from the gas stove in the house have made him more ill but there is nothing more that they can do about it.

Someone (I don’t quite know who) sponsored them with a few groceries but supplies will soon run out because of the many mouths to feed.

We have received no information on the child since then.